rings of saturn

the colossal beauty of a human face buried in another's neck
ties me to
a childhood memory, fits of laughter
of being tickled senseless

I listen for the rain
in servitude
as it barrels down
making connections between all of the raindrops
and the warmth beneath your skin

somewhere in time this moment is unfolding
but for now
just my pen pressed against paper
all of my ritual magic
simplified to small wrist movements
on the edge of symbolic empty space
made from the bodies of sacrificial trees
this is what i do to sing in reality
nothing too fancy
just heartbreakingly slow enough to notice---

falling to earth i realize my sense of solitude is brief

When I open my mouth it only means I don't know

what would i say if if i could speak honestly
if i could give you words without need underneath,
other than I love you, I hope you make it in one piece

I was cut from stone
and then was born from clay
now my blood does freely flow
I'll give it back someday

I can see the sun
there's water in my eye
round in circles run
until the day we die

round in circles go
makes time to pass us by

my breath is in the wind
my body in the soil
with thoughts illuminate the dark
say, "time to rest from toil!"

I know that sometimes I like my coffee black
my eggs runny
I saw it it in a movie once
and got stuck on the evocation
of white sky
and vague nostalgia
maybe inconsolable family knottedness
is born of the same motive
of choosing bitterness
as a means to softening

sometimes I think we are the greatest
I know we are
always a pleasure to be us
no matter what happens
whatever it is that experiences us
is great

to look across the table at the cafe
into the brightness of your face
feeling supported by songs I know well
and your vibrant presence

lost loss

I am looking forward into my life
when this happens I am dreaming
no future exists
but I am quick to compensate

marriage from one to another
I expect
with a loss of self
that one can hope to merit

who am I but the thinness
between lonely
and holy

I alone
when uttered wordlessly
I hear in ache
when felt
the greatest joy cannot describe

Kalachakra

feelings strong like aged perfume
glass bottles in the ornate basket
oriental and attractive
gathers dust in the shed
thought i found it on accident
but of course you planted it
only a relic because we attached it
to a story well fastened
you remember what happened
otherwise just something happening
objects in front of me
objective anomaly
like when i bound my wrists with pearls
memory box is fading gold and wooden
only said that because i thought it might be nice
to have that for a second
if only in thought
then just for a second
just a suggestion
ache in my ankle only sensation
with each step a prostration
measure the earth with the length of our bodies
if we must count,
do
so
to
free
hello stranger i take it you know me
energy meet energy

I pulled off the veil of metaphor
my patience grew thin
want to cover up my love again
so I can take it outside
bring it over in swaddling clothes
to show you what I've done

think I'm hungry and eager
like a newborn's fever
oh what is this?
embedded in my false progeny
I try to make do
without making way
for new life