Got to get down to get up

I know what I want 

and still, 

I writhe in lies

who does this 

through me 

who does this? 

Am I pure enough to see them through? 

Or will I be consumed by the desire of the ones I love. 

by my desire for the ones I love. 

No one is doing this to me or for me. 

What is this growing up? 

That one time I was scared

I might have forgotten how to put my feelings into words.

In the blinding light of Oneness there was no need to explain myself.

I am certain that the fade is fine.

I am here now. Mostly terrified of feeling apart from you or anyone else under the Sun.

I wanted us all to be the face of God.

I was so sure that we were.

Perception is clouded by depression.

That is what this is. 
I know that